“What are you wearing?”
It’s a legitimate question when it comes from a friend who doesn’t want to be inappropriately dressed for your girls’ night out. Or when voiced by your very fashionable daughters who would be embarrassed if your attire did not befit a woman also known as their mother. Or when whined by your own mother who’d love nothing more than a new son-in-law to torment.
But not from an old geezer who only minutes earlier introduced himself via JDate’s instant messaging. And whose left hand was undoubtedly quite busily involved beneath his shorts as he typed with his right.
Guys, we know how much you love sex. And we know that you think about it — on the average — almost as often as you inhale.
But while we do enjoy your visits to our little retreat, the long and winding indirect route will get you there much faster than your usual colorless, over-used short-cut.
Whatever happened to romance? Did the booty call say a eulogy over it that we missed somewhere along the line?
Yes, I am perfectly capable of opening my own doors, but I love it when you do it for me.
Yes, I am perfectly capable of buying my own flowers, but I love it when you buy them for me.
Yes, I am perfectly capable of preparing my own candlelit dinner, but I love it so much more when you cook it for me.
Slow down and court me with some of the romantic little indulgences that set my heart aflutter because, honestly, I’m also perfectly capable of producing my own orgasms.